Freak

"So what are you going to do?", Lovely said.

"Nothing. I am going straight to work, then taking the train out at 2:30, I won't think about this until I'm back from Philly Tuesday". I added three pairs of socks, and a book ("The Six Cents - by Knight Shyamalan") on the top of 3 neatly folded shirts of varying pinkness in plastic covers.

"And then?"

"And then I tell him we're off, we're through, finito. I can't go through life with a freak."

"He's not a freak. He's just a litte uh...dogged by bad karma lately". Lovely likes to stick up for Manish, because he brings Pinkberry icecream home every Friday evening, and he always brings her some, even though she doesn't live with us. And he guards it like a cat from me, checking the fridge everyday to see if the box has been moved around. I mean, she doesn't even come by for 3-4 days sometimes, and it sits there perfectly aligned with the black line on the fridge light he drew, so he'd know if it was moved. Yeah, I know about that. It's low. It sucks. It's Manish's bloody sense of fair play

"He is a freak. I've never even heard of things like that happening to anybody once, and it happens to him all the time.He's a whole Ripley's book all by himself". I added the black eyehole top that I think is sexy, actually a little slutty. The eyehole is just a little too big.

She was trying that face on me again, the Mother Theresa Accosted by Man Selling Viagra Still Life in Poster colors face. "Why do you wear that thing? It's hideous, it makes you look like a tramp. I'm not surprised if men feel like stopping you and saying Ëxcuse me, how much for half-hour?"

"I like slutty. You have no kink in your soul, that's the problem. Besides, men like that don't waste time saying Excuse Me". She's irritated, and I'm off to a good day. I'll be all sweetness at the office now.

"But I haven't told you what happened yesterday", I continue.

"What yesterday?"

"Yesterday we were getting ready for Ennis's party, and Manish was sitting on the bed, checking the laptop for map directions, and he was drinking Coke straight from the liter bottle, like he does, and he drank a little too much too quickly. Started to come out of his nose. Have you ever snorted Coke from your nose? It stings your nasal membranes like two hells. So he spit out the Coke from his mouth, and it landed on the keyboard of the laptop, and shorted it. Blew up sparks all around like mini fireworks. It gave him a bad shock."

"Oh my god, it must have scared him." Lovely was concerned and excited at the same time. She's not bad, actually. She really likes Manish, but she also likes to hear how Manish gets it under the chin sometimes.

I swung around the bed and sat down next to her. I have to be leaving soon. But this story has got to be finished.
"No, I mean he really got an actual electric shock. Couldn't feel his fingers and toes for a while. We gave Ennis and his party a miss, went to Emergency instead. Had to tell this story to the doc three times. He was very doubtful. He thought maybe we'd been doing some Friday evening after-work happy-shiny highs. I had to tell him some of the other stories. How Manish was shaving with a knife in memory of the old Italian barbershop his father used to take him to, and how he sneezed and cut his jugular and had to go to St Martins through Memorial Weekend traffic wrapped in a bed sheet, because there was no time to dress.

"The nephew story?" she volunteered. She knows all the stories now, better than me. She's even been using it as a fallback conversation picker-upper when nothing else works on whichever colleague she's trying to get interested in her.

"That too. Although the doctor thought I was exaggerating when I said Manish actually killed his own nephew by falling on him. He said it was extremely unlikely - any 4 year old would be hurt, perhaps bruised quite a bit, but die of internal bleeding from an elbow in his stomach? But it happens to Manish. Anyhow, the thing I wanted to tell you is that Manish told me something weird last night.after we got back from the hospital"

Lovely's eyeballs grew large.

"He said that just before anything nasty like this happens to him, he has like a split second thought of 'What if an accident like this happened?', and then it really happens. Each and every time."

"He's got precognition?!" - she said, now actually aroused, "He can see it before stuff happens!". Her excitable hand was messing up the clothes in my suitcase,. I shut it, pushed the zipper around in one swift circular motion, then pulled it off the bed and stood up, ready to leave.

"No, that's not quite it." I was definitely late now.
"Manish thinks he's actually making this stuff happen by thinking it".

She stared at me. "Why would he make such stuff happen?"

I had this last bit well prepared, "He said he may be doing it to get me to dump him. Because I won't want to be near someone who has accidents all the time".

She was all up on Manish's side now. "And you are? Going to dump him for thinking that? That's not fair. I mean, even if he's nuts thinking what he's thinking, it's not true, you know that."

"Yes, I know it's not the truth. He's a freak, I told you". I stepped out the door, closed it behind me. I stood for a minute.
I should, I shouldn't.
I shouldn't.
I should ?

I opened the door and peeked back at her. She was still standing where she had stood. I grinned.
"He's doing it for you. Will you call him and tell him I ate your icecream?"

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